Seven weeks

I cannot believe seven weeks has gone by... seven weeks and three days to be exact. Time has been on my mind a lot this weekend, for various reasons.

The most pressing thing is that I go back to work tomorrow. Now, I like my job...don't get me wrong. In fact, I really like it. And I trust the people who are going to watch Brayden (Adam, my parents and my sister). I know he'll be in good hands. But it's hard to believe that I will be away from him for 20 hours a week (plus driving back and forth). He seems to have done okay the few times I have left him, but he is definitely a momma's boy when I am around, so I hope he does okay. This picture kinda shows what a momma's boy he is. Adam is holding him at the restaurant table, and when I started talking, he kept trying to turn his head to see me.


The second thing is how big he is getting! He is doing so good on holding his head up, and on using his leg muscles to support some of his weight. Truthfully, I mostly mean about his weight though. He's in about the 95th percentile. I shouldn't be surprised, seeing as he was big at birth. And I know he'll lose some of the baby fat once he is more mobile. It's sad, though- I have already had to put away some 0-3 months clothes. He's not even 2 months! And he's in size 2 diapers! He weighs about 13 lbs, even more if my method of weighing myself and then me holding him is accurate. Here's a picture of him today. I put him in an outfit I really like on him. He hadn't worn it in awhile though because we have so many clothes for him. The onesie and the shorts are both 0-3 months. The onesie was a little tight both lengthwise and widthwise. The shorts are obviously tight widthwise, as evidenced by his "muffin top."

The other two things have to do with money. We had to buy diapers this weekend. Until now, we haven't had to buy any. We've used what the hospital sent home with us, and what our WONDERFUL family and friends gave us. I capitalize that because until yesterdy, I had no idea diapers were so freaking expensive! What's funny is that if he had been smaller we would have made it at least another two weeks without having to buy any, but we were not able to use all of the newborn diapers from the hospital and from my friend Kimberly. (I don't have a picture to go with the diapers, but here's one of him in his car seat. I like to say that sometimes in the car, he becomes a "zen Buddha." It fits, okay?! First, he's a chubster, like Buddha. Second, the way his legs and little hands are reminds me of someone meditating.)


The other thing related to money is that I start Weight Watchers again this last week. When you become pregnant, you are kind of put on hold, but if you join back before your baby is 8 weeks, you don't have to pay the registration fee again. It's weird to get back into tracking and looking at the nutritional info more closely. I kind of let it all go during pregnancy and gained way too much (as anyone who saw me in the last month of it could attest to). It's weird though. I get 10 extra points because I am breastfeeding, so I don't even feel like I am dieting or anything. Except for the fact that I won't be having fast food anymore, except for the occasional Chick-Fil-A. Which reminds me- let it be known that I have not had even the smallest bit of chocolate for over two weeks now! On August 5th, he was extremely fussy. I was just about at my wit's end. Well, the culprit was mostly likely chocolate, because I had had a lot of it on both the 4th and the 5th. So I decided to give it up for now. I might start having some again when he is on solids. Apparently at that point, their stomachs can handle some of the stuff they couldn't before, so moms can start having the "forbidden food" again. But for now, I'm doing it for his sake, for my waist's sake, and just to know that I have the willpower to do it. I never thought I could go even a week without chocolate. Usually I had some everyday, even if it was just a small amount. Anyways, enough with my rambling. I'll just leave you with one last picture, if you've gotten this far! It's not a great picture, but it shows his huge smile!

I don't know why it is showing it sideways, sorry you have to turn your head to really see it well!

Finally

posting his newborn pictures only three weeks later. He was two and a half weeks old when these were taken. We got them done at Target, and the ladies there were amazing. He had a blowout diaper while one of them was holding him, and she didn't care. They also didn't mind leaving the studio for me to nurse him in the middle of the session because he was getting fussy. Anyways, here are the pictures. They scanned a little weird with lightness in the corner of most of the pictures (they are not that way IRL).

This one is my favorite because I see it as his newborn look, his "what in the world is going on in this new crazy place?" look. I love it! He's just about 6 weeks now, and he hardly makes this face now.

My 2nd favorite

This one is Adam's favorite.

This one is Adam's favorite.

So...

Yeah, I haven't been posting much. Haven't had too much to say. I'm just enjoying my time at home with Brayden while I have it. I am starting to get out more with him though, which has been nice. I am currently pre-occupied with two things (other than the baby of course):

-When I am home, there is a good chance the tv show Friends is on. I own the first two seasons, so I started with those and I'm now on season 4 thanks to the library. It's a little weird to re-watch it now. I forgot how good it was! It was weird to start on the first season where Ross mentions his age (26). I'm 26, but for some reason they still feel older than me on the show. I'm sure that's because I was so much younger when I watched it the first time, and because I know the actors from the show are in their 40s. I really enjoyed watching all of the stuff that had to do with Ben and his birth.... and of course I have enjoyed watching Ross and Rachel. I also have noticed foreshadowing for Monica and Chandler that I never noticed before. Anyways, enough about a tv show.

-The second thing I am pre-occuiped with is breastfeeding. I know this is a touchy subject for some, but I feel like I need to get some of my feelings out. Luckily, I have found an outlet. The Utah Breastfeeding Coalition is having events all month long down at the Main library. I have only been to one so far, but it was great. To put my opinion plainly, I believe that women have the right to choose not to breastfeed, and that is fine, but I firmly believe that society has almost made breastfeeding seem unnatural and that is just wrong. I have many more opinions on the subject, but I don't want to offend anyone or step on any toes, so I will leave it at that.

And to end on a happy note, here is the most recent pic of my little babe taking a nap with his daddy so I can be on the computer:

Brayden, Veronica Mars, Michael J. Fox, and Clint Eastwood

What could these people have in common? Well, this is how I have been spending my time the last week. Being with Brayden, watching the series Veronica Mars, reading Always Looking Up by Michael J. Fox and tonight watching Gran Torino.


Here is another picture of my little cutie-pie. I will hopefully post more pics soon- we have some cute ones from his first bath and then we got pictures taken at Target on Monday, so I will scan and post those when we get them. I will admit to having discouraging moments, mostly on days where he wants to feed seemingly all day, but for the most part I am just so happy being his mom!



I've seen the whole series before, but decided to watch it again. I've been watching a lot of tv and movies while nursing. This is one of my favorite shows. Next up is either Arrested Development (which I have seen before also), or 30 Rock if I can get it from the library.



This is a great book. I really admire how well he has dealt with what life has dealt him. I know people would argue his fame has made his sutation easier to deal with, but I still respect the optimism he has been able to maintain in spite of his disease.



I will preface this by saying this movie is rated R. There is a lot of swearing, and violence as well. However, it has a great message. It's about an old man who is both racist and stuck in his ways (played brillantly by Clint Eastwood). His wife dies and he gets "stuck" dealing with the Hmong family next door.

Favorites of 2009 (So Far)

Books
The Hunger Games by Suzanne Collins
Little Brother by Cory Doctorow
Why We Can't Wait by Martin Luther King, Jr.
The Glass Castle by Jeannette Wells
The Book Thief by Marcus Zusak
A Wrinkle in Time by Madeleine L'Engle
The Year of Living Biblically by AJ Jacobs
Bridget Jones's Diary by Helen Fielding
The Graveyard Book by Neil Gaiman
Return to Sender by Julia Alvarez

Movies

Phoebe in Wonderland
Up
The Proposal
The Hangover
Earth

Want to see (whether it is out now, or yet to be released): Sunshine Cleaning, Observe and Report, 17 Again, The Soloist, Star Trek, Angels and Demons, The Brothers Bloom, Away We Go, Food, Inc., My Sister's Keeper, Harry Potter and the Half-Blood Prince, 500 Days of Summer, The Ugly Truth, Paper Heart, The Time Traveler's Wife, Post Grad, Cloudy With a Chance of Meatballs, Love Happens, Where the Wild Things Are, Amelia, New Moon

I know I won't see many of these movies until they come out on DVD, and I am perfectly fine with that. I am getting a lot of reading done though, which is nice.

One week

I seriously cannot believe Brayden is a week old already! He's in my arms right now, content but hiccuping (and making this really hard to type). I took this picture earlier today on my cell phone, so it isn't the best quality but I thought it was so cute. I just wanted to document some of our first week together so I never forget it:

-He still doesn't seem like a big baby to me- except for his hands (as you can tell in the picture).

-He is definitely arm-spoiled. He has never fallen asleep actually in his crib. He has once or twice in our bed with one or both of us next to him and in his car seat/stroller on walks, but mostly he falls asleep while being fed or being held.

-He's already peed on me- once while I was changing him and once it leaked out of his diaper while I was feeding him onto my leg. My friend says I'm still not fully inducted into motherhood until he pees on my face though. :) He has also wet the bed already- he soaked through his diaper while on our bed.

-He doesn't really sleep in his bassinet- so I guess it was a waste of money. He usually spend the first 3/4ths of the night in his crib (minus feedings), but usually ends up in our bed after I feed him between 3-6 am. It's weird because I really thought he would sleep in the bassinet next to my side of the bed, and I definitely didn't think I would do any co-sleeping. It's nice to have him so close though.

-We have said something to the tune of "He's adorable" and "I love you, Brayden" and "I'm so happy he's here" about a million times in the last week! And it is so true- it has only been a week but he's my whole life already!

Brayden Michael Bishop

Brayden Michael Bishop was born July 2nd, at 5:05 pm. He is 19 inches long and weighs 9 lbs 14 oz. And both Adam and I are completely in love with him!

I woke up that morning around 3 am with contractions. I had been having contractions, as well as some pre-labor signs for a few days, but these were different. Everyone told me I would know when it was real, when I was really in labor, and they were right. I could tell that they were getting both stronger and closer together. I alternated sitting on my "birth ball" (just an exercise ball) and getting things finished up around the house like dishes and my hospital bag. I woke Adam up around 5:30 and then called my midwife about an hour later. She told me to head to the hospital around 7:30 or 8:00. When we got there, she was there already (she delivered 3 babies that day!) and she checked me. I was dilated to a 5. She had me walk the halls as much as I could (which wasn't very much because of the contractions). I kept having to stop walking wherever I was, and lean against Adam or the wall through my contractions. Eventually she broke my waters. It got worse after that. The babe was face first, which led to some really intense back labor. The tub helped somewhat, but not as much as I had hoped. At one point, I was SO ready to beg for an epidural. My midwife was seeing patients at her office across the street at the time, though... which I am thankful for now. I'm also so grateful for Adam, my mom and my sister. Everytime I begged for one, they reassured me that this was what I wanted and that I could do it. Once my midwife got back, she was with me the rest of the time. She made me do some really uncomfortable things to try to get the baby to turn, but he didn't until I was pushing. I think I pushed for about an hour, although I am not sure. The room was pretty dim. I kept looking at the clock in between pushes, but couldn't see the time. It sure felt like forever. I really felt like I must be doing something wrong, like it was taking too long. His heartrate went a little low at some point, so they put oxygen on me. Finally, she told me to reach down and feel his head. After that, it was probably only 10 more minutes to get his whole head and then his body out. When she told me to reach down and take my baby, I just could not believe I was done. Her and the nurse immediately started wiping him off while I was holding him, and they went on and on about how big he was. After I held him for a few minutes, they took him to weigh him. And then Adam got to hold him for a little bit while my midwife finished with me, and then I got to feed him.

The rest of my stay had its ups and downs. There were some great nurses, and there were some terrible ones. There were some things done that I didn't want done, but people kept pressuring me and telling me it needed to be done. By the time Saturday morning came along, I was more than ready to go home and be in charge of my own baby and his care. And now that we are home, I am loving it! I get nervous that I am doing things wrong, or not well enough, but I am slowly learning to trust myself. We both stop and just randomly say things to each other like "We are so lucky!" or "He is so perfect."