pet peeve

I hate when people ask me if I have a good baby! I'm sure they mean well, and are just curious... but still, it annoys me because you have to wonder if they actually think babies are ever bad. According to their standards, mine just might be. He doesn't sleep through the night, he's very arm-spoiled, he's into everything with all his new mobility, and he's very clingy and wary of strangers right now. I would never classify him as bad though. Babies are babies, and they have needs. If their needs are not being met, then of course they will cry and attempt to communicate that with you. That does not make them bad.

I've been trying to think of clever retorts, like:

"No, he's bad." or
"Well, he hasn't ended up in prison yet." or
"We like him." or
"He's good at being a baby, if that's what you mean."

For the record: I don't mind loved ones asking if he's had a good or bad day. I also know people slip up and ask the typical questions that if they actually stopped to think about they would realize it's a dumb question. I know I asked it before I had a baby of my own. I know I assumed so many things before I had a child of my own so I can't blame people. I was also of the mindset back then that breastfeeding vs. formula feeding didn't really matter, that you should never let your baby sleep with you, and that some babies were brats. Now I know how wrong that was to think however, and I just think this question of whether babies are good perpetuates that idea.

To end on a happy note, look at this beautiful picture and these wonderful words of advice (written to dads but applicable to moms, grandparents, aunts, uncles and any and all other caregivers):




Instructions: Dads, please read carefully before raising. This is a baby. It needs you. It needs your love, your touch, and your time. Spend lots of time with it. Build a bird house. Read a book. Go for a walk. Do homework. Play. The more time you spend, the better chance it has of growing up happy and healthy. It grows very quickly. Pay attention. Never underestimate the difference you make. It takes a man to be a dad.